When I got to high school, my inferiority complex got the best of me. I was in a gifted school. A highly selective school for gifted and talented students in Nigeria. Yet, I sucked at maths. It seemed like I didn’t fit in or I wasn’t good enough to be there. And again, my mom shaved my hair in 7th grade. To make matters worse, I was bullied and body shamed by my classmates. I didn’t feel pretty, smart, or worthy. I felt like I was intellectually, physically, and socially inferior to my friends. Once I had successfully accepted myself, I discovered how lucky I was. I became inspired by my own story. I realized how hard I have worked to be a better person and I decided to dedicate my time to helping other people. I wished to enable them to soar above their constant self-disapproval. And as I publish this post today, I hope that it will help someone out there. There’s nothing wrong with you. You need to understand that everyone in this world is inferior in one way or the other. You are beautiful, special, and wonderful. You need to appreciate the things you have. You need to identify your strengths and focus on developing them. Your weaknesses and strengths make you unique. There would be no you without them. Trying to change or presenting a false side of yourself to people will not help you become better. It would crush your mind instead. Finally, I want you to know this. NOBODY IS SUPERIOR. NOBODY IS INFERIOR. BUT NOBODY IS EQUAL EITHER. PEOPLE ARE SIMPLY UNIQUE, AND INCOMPARABLE. YOU ARE YOU. I AM I.How I Overcame My Inferiority Complex
I wasn’t expecting to receive any emails from this blog within the first 24 hours of my first blog posts. I was really surprised to find two wonderful emails from two visitors but their identity would obviously be hidden from this blog to respect their privacy.
From the emails received, I was able to detect a similar problem between them. With their permission, I decided to create this post to discuss this challenge with you. Its good to always share a story or advise because you don’t know how many people may need it.
Define Yourself Always, Be Confident. A person should be two things; who and what she wants to be. Be what you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter, don’t mind. Be who you want to be, don’t let people bring you down. Just put yourself out there and hope for the best. Don’t wait for approval in being who you are, don’t take anything from anyone and always stand up for yourself. Carry yourself like a queen and you will attract a king.
Believe In Yourself, believe in your dreams and your potentials. Do not believe in the haters because they believe in nothing. That’s why they are haters. Believe in all you are and acknowledge there’s something inside you that is greater than any obstacles because believing in your abilities affects your motivation, your choices, your toughness, and your determination. If you don’t believe in yourself, then nobody will.
Do Not Question Your Life. Don’t ask yourself too many questions about life because once you do, you’re going to end up going insane looking for the right answer. Most questions in life don’t have answers. Don’t ask why people keep hurting you, ask yourself why you allow that to happen. Concern yourself with not what is right or wrong but what is important. Somebody died last night, but you didn’t. Somebody didn’t wake up this morning, but you did. You’re not lucky, you’re blessed.
Do Not Compare Yourself To Anyone. Don’t compare yourself to others, compare yourself to who you were yesterday. Don’t ever compare yourself to anything in this world because if you do, you’re insulting yourself. Don’t rush the process. Allow yourself to grow at your own pace. Stop comparing your life to what other people are doing. The worst thing you can do to yourself is judge yourself through the eyes of others.
Flee From Jealousy And Envy. Don’t envy anyone because everyone has something no one has. Develop that one thing about yourself and make it outstanding. Don’t waste your time on jealousy because sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and at the end, its only with yourself. Accept what is. Let go of what was. And have faith in what will be. Your Speed doesn’t matter, Forward is Forward. Life is very short, so forgive quickly, believe slowly, love truly, laugh loudly and never avoid anything that makes you smile.
Don’t lose yourself trying to hold onto someone who doesn’t care about losing you. Don’t lose yourself, its good to follow leaders but its even better to become one. Don’t lose yourself in an attempt to recover money, people or your past because those things never last. If you were happy before you met someone, you can be happy after they’re gone. Putting yourself first isn’t selfish, it’s necessary. Be there for others but never leave yourself behind because there are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind.
Motivate Yourself. Everyday you need to look yourself in the eye and ask yourself if this is what you should be doing with your life. Every morning, take a good look at yourself in the mirror and say I am going to have a great day. Every single day, you should wake up and commit yourself to becoming a better person. Remember, it’s easy to get started, but the real fight is to keep going even on the days you don’t feel like it. It’s these days that you want to quit that will make you successful.
Everyone one of us is born with unlimited potential, we have the ability and intelligence to make the impossible possible. Remember, the only person that can hold you back in life is yourself, you just cant dream it, you must believe that you have the power to achieve it. Getting ahead in a difficult profession requires avid faith in yourself. That is why some people with mediocre talent, but with great inner drive, go much further than people with vastly superior talent. Forgive those who insult you, attack you or take you for granted. But more than that, forgive yourself for allowing them to hurt you. Surround yourself with people who have dreams, desire and ambition. They will help you realize your own. Being happy doesn’t mean you’re perfect. It just means you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections. A day without laughter is a day wasted !!!!
Never be ashamed of your hustle. Nobody will feed you if you go broke!! One day you will tell your story of how you’re overcome what you’re going through now, and it will become part of someone else’s survival guide.
There is alot to say or write but for now;
You are free, you are powerful, you are good, you are love, you have value, you have a purpose. All is well.